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Cavan Report

The Cavan Report by Darron Costello

We all did a little trampolining, and following a hearty (totally un-sexy) Chinese take-away dinner, we all retired to our beds.


During the weekend, people drank only to satisfy their thirst as the need arose. A peculiar side effect to Cavan water made many thirsty trampoliners dizzy and prone to laughter, shouting, and occasionally fighting.

Dental inspections were carried out routinly every night by hoards of helpful and friendly people. Due to lack of proper lighting, this was best achieved through probing with the tongue.

Gareth had a highly perplexing problem with one of his lower molars which stumped most of the dentists present, requiring referal from one dentist to the next to the next to the next to the next, and so on, and so on, and so on. This remains an on-going problem.

Two rare "Fuglyus-Maximus" were also spotted, which is a rare honour during their winter mating season. Although initially mistaken for a large roll of rubbery carpeting, the distinctive colouring of the male made identification later possible.

Also, morning prayer attendance sored.

All in all a very polite and gay (as in happy) weekend.